If you're new to shadow work, here's a quick guide on how to accept and integrate your shadow self.
Before we get into it, let's go over some key concepts.
What is Shadow Self & Shadow Work?
Your shadow self, or shadow, is the side of yourself you have no awareness of. It holds all the qualities you disowned during your formative years.
Although you learned to repress these qualities and push them outside of your awareness, they still live underneath the surface.
They unconsciously guide your actions and are the unseen cause for many of the troubles in your life.
Shadow work is the intentional practice of becoming aware of your unconscious shadow and integrating these neglected qualities into your being—becoming whole.
This is a process of building self-awareness, self-acceptance, and universal Love.
"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate."
Carl Jung
NEXT READ: Everything About Shadow Work (Comprehensive In-Depth Guide)
How to Accept & Integrate Your Shadow Self
After you learn to identify your own shadow, it's crucial that you accept it, along with its unconscious desires, and integrate your shadow side.
What does it mean to integrate your shadow?
Shadow integration is bringing your shadow qualities into awareness and accepting them as part of your being.
After identifying your shadow, you can honor it by fulfilling your unconscious desires and acting out its qualities.
For example, if you are personally triggered by impulsiveness, you may need to integrate your spontaneity.
Because somehow, during your life, you decided to disown your own spontaneity.
Ideally, through a healthy outlet, integrating your own spontaneous qualities would mean making space to express them in your own life.
You do this because you want your mind to accept this quality as a part of its identity. The best way for your mind to believe it's a "certain way" is to provide it with evidence.
What does shadow work look like? Shadow Work Examples
Shadow work is the intentional practice of becoming aware of your unconscious shadow to integrate your neglected qualities into your being—becoming whole.
This is typically a practice where you self-inquiry, observe your inner resources and reflect on what's underneath the surface.
Shadow work prompts are a popular method of doing shadow work, where you journal and self-reflect on a set of thoughtful questions. By putting your emotions and thoughts into words, you are "feeling" through and processing your inner world.
The purpose of these prompts is to work through your triggers, inner child healing, gain perspective for emotional maturity, and so on.
Active imagination is a meditation technique where you project an emotion, or an archetype (shadow, inner child, anima/animus), onto an inner voice or imaginary image.
It's the most direct way to get the conscious to communicate with the unconscious.
You let your mind create a form for the unconscious to inhabit. Then you mentally let go of control of that form—allowing it to act independently.
Then you consult the form and ask it questions, which the unconscious will respond to.
Understand that the conscious mind is limited, while the unconscious mind is limitless and doesn't lie.
By being genuinely curious, you can demand the shadow to tell you what it wants from you and for you.
Expect this to be physically draining. Maybe even experience emotional catharsis.
Should I do shadow work everyday?
Depends on how badly you need it.
If life is going reasonably well and you don't feel triggered or compelled to demonize anyone on a regular basis, probably not so much.
But if life is not going your way and you have a low opinion of yourself, the world, and humanity—
Then you should consider doing some sort of shadow work every day as a form of "self-therapy."
If you have built an incredibly strong desire for very dark impulses—that is impossible to ignore—consider meeting with a professional.
In the meantime, a very simple affirmation you can use is "I love myself."
This is somewhat of a "cheap" but effective trick to settle your ego and shadow.
By repeating the words "I love myself" to yourself for minutes, hours, or even days, you will develop an appreciation for yourself as a whole—
Mainly since the affirmation implies unconditional love, it will ease any shadow material that usually arises out of you unconsciously.
You can repeat this affirmation aloud or in your head. At least until you find some further guidance.
What happens when you integrate your shadow?
When you integrate your shadow you become whole.
You can tap into the entire spectrum of your personality. Thus, allowing you to access all of your potentials.
Not only this, but you no longer have to rely only on your own willpower.
By giving your shadow the recognition it needs, you satisfy its desire for recognition so it can let go of its hold on your life.
Those things in life you wanted to pursue and accomplish no longer have resistance around them.
Because you have the energy, creativity, and will of your entire being to thank for that.
Understand: Balancing the ego and the shadow is not a contradiction; it's a paradox.
A person who integrates her shadow is a healthy being.
She sees life as her creative canvas, and she immerses feelings of love and oneness with all things.
Loving oneself means loving all of oneself.
This includes the shadow—that which was unacceptable and previously rejected.
At this level of awareness, she can enjoy life and act with spontaneity.
She enjoys true intimacy without the unconscious need to play dysfunctional games.
She has total control of her life, and she's able to pursue what she desires without resistance.
All it took was the journey within.
Here are some resources I recommend:
A Light Among Shadows is a guide to self-love and being that helps you overcome negative self-talk, instill genuine self-acceptance, and overcome self-hate and resentment by making sense of people’s level of consciousness and your spirituality.
Shadow Work for Beginners Series helps you beat negative patterns and beliefs, integrate your shadow, heal your inner child, reclaim your projections, build emotional maturity, and take back your life by becoming whole.
Shadow Work for Relationship Series helps you heal your attachment style, navigate relationship issues, and build a healthy, mature relationship.
Advanced Shadow Work is an ongoing publication with continued in-depth insight and practical advice you won't find anywhere else on the internet for practicing shadow work, self-awareness, inner healing, spiritual development, and more!
Social Media:
TikTok | Instagram | Threads
Twitter | Pinterest | Podcast | YouTube
Approved Tools
Tarot Cards (incl. Manifestation Manual ebook) provide insight and intuitive guidance for personal growth and decision-making.
Chakra Crystals (incl. Ancestral Healing ebook) can bring balance and harmony to your mind, body, and spirit.
Book of Shadows (incl. Shadow Work Journal) is your own special journal that you fill up with your energetic intentions as you scribe your own inner practices to be passed down to others.
Subliminal Bundle uses different hypnosis tracks to subconsciously improve your health, love life, motivation, self-love and much more.
These products are not affiliate links, we do not get a commission when you purchase these tools. We are supportive of our partnership with Sinful Goods for offering small websites a chance to promote their brands.
About:
Intro | Life Lessons | Newsletter | Coaching
Sensual Shadow Play is practiced through BDSM experiences. If you are 18+ and are interested, go here.
