Are you wondering, “does everyone have an inner child?”
Yes, everyone has an inner child. It’s the true, uncontaminated essence of who we are; that which is spirited, creative, authentic, and accepting.
Before we go into more details, let’s go over a few things.
What is the Inner Child?
Your inner child, similar to your shadow, is part of your unconscious mind.
Your wounded inner child is a part of yourself that’s stuck in a time where you didn’t fully process your emotions.
This wounding typically involves learning to disown a part of yourself and leaving it behind.
Family and culture make you embrace some parts of your Self, while completely abandoning others.
This happens when a child idealizes her parents and follows arbitrary rules for survival.
These rules implicitly embed the child with the unconscious idea that she is “bad”—which is a typical childhood experience.
When the child sees that some of her feelings and thoughts are unacceptable, she chooses to get rid of them.
(This creates the child’s “inner parent”, which encourages obedience at the cost of being whole.)
Then the rules and unconscious beliefs you learned as a child evolve and are carried into adulthood.
What is Inner Child Work?
Inner child work, or inner child healing, is becoming aware of what aspects of yourself you’ve denied and redeeming them via conscious integration.
It’s doing the griefwork to digest and process emotions that you carry from the past.
While becoming conscious of the underlying beliefs that have been driving your existence.
By doing this, you become more emotionally mature and experience universal Love.
You can also do inner healing through shadow work prompts.
Does everyone have an inner child?
Yes, everyone has an inner child.
An inner child is wounded when you have experienced being repressed and invalidated.
Which is also known as self-abandonment. Where you become increasingly emotionally numb and tolerant to emotional pain.
This happens because the child isn’t given a chance to grieve. Preventing the wound from healing and the emotion from digesting.
This self-abandonment and these inner wounds are what block you off from your transcendent function—the natural ability to seek inner guidance.
(When you lack this connection, you are unable to manifest without sufficient inner work.)
The wounded inner is usually a reflection of your parents. The wounded child has grown into the wounded adult that you are today.
These wounds are based on dysfunctional, unconscious beliefs about yourself.
Some examples of these underlying beliefs include:
- Nobody can be trusted
- I’m blameless & you’ll always forgive me
- I’m always wrong
- I am pure
- I am helpless
- The world wants to dominate me
- I’ve always been a loser
- Everyone is ungrateful
These beliefs you’ve built from childhood will create the adult you behave as today.
You will unconsciously live out these positions in your relationships to reaffirm —even when it’s against your self-interest.
Until you become aware of this, your psyche is in arrested development.
Becoming aware of these underlying existential beliefs, engaging with your inner self and doing the proper grief work can help mend these wounds.
Here are some resources I recommend:
Shadow Work for Beginners is based on my in-depth research and personal experiences with shadow work, projection, sadomasochism, inner child healing, triggers, and all things shadow. This resource gets updated at no additional cost.
A Light Among Shadows is a guide on self-love and being. This series goes over consciousness, spirituality, philosophy, and makes sense of why people are the way they are. Recommended for anyone dealing with resentment and self-hate. Learn more here.
Shadow Work for Relationships teaches you everything you need to know about attachment theory, practical inner work, and your dysfunctional behavior. By the end of this, you will have developed your earned secure attachment style so you can put an end to your cycle of bad relationships.
Shadow Work Journal: 240 Daily Shadow Work Prompts contains inner work exercises related to relationships, anger, anxiety, self-love, healing trauma, abandonment issues, depression, forgiveness, etc.
Self-Love Subliminal for self-hypnotism that will help you change your behavior and gain self-love, self-awareness, better relationships, greater health, and improve your creativity.
Shadow Play (or “DsR”) is a sister website that goes over “sensual” shadow work through BDSM experiences. If you are 18+ and are interested, go here.
Mindful & Mending is a small website that’s about self-hypnosis, affirmations, auto-suggestion, and more techniques & tools to help you shift your unconscious mind. Check it out here.