The following blog posts were written on my original blog over five years ago. This article is part of my 37 Life Lessons From My Youth Series. Note: I’ve matured a lot since then and my “voice” has changed since. Enjoy.
What Is A Big Move?
A big move is essentially a change of lifestyle:
- Will you live here or there?
- Are you going to be responsible for this or that?
- Will you do this alone or with others?
You can choose to live like this or live like that or do both. But whichever you don’t have experience with can be a struggle.
With bad timing and execution you can find yourself lonely, unhappy, and scraping by.
But with a proper plan you can find yourself more prosperous. Yet you wouldn’t know until you try.
So how do you know when it’s time for a big move?
That’s easy.
When you’re tired of living the life you currently lead and you ask yourself – is this it?
“Well shit, this isn’t enough. Did I settle before? Gross.”
What if it’s too hard to change?
Think about it like this:
Do you know why you procrastinate making the changes you want to make?
It’s because you have a bad self-image. You have little faith in yourself.
Need proof? Ask yourself this:
What do you believe people think about you?
If you procrastinate for big changes, chances are not good.
Since you automatically think other people have a bad opinion of you, then obviously you have a bad opinion of yourself.
Ultimately, you think you’re not good enough.
For example, someone calls you stupid. If it’s anyone relatively important to you, the thought is gonna stick.
They sold you the idea that you’re stupid. And now that criticism stays in the back of your head.
Now whenever you consider making a big move you know you should do – in the back of your head you hear their whisper calling you stupid. Along with all the other criticisms you’ve heard from people.
People’s whispers can haunt you. But only if you haven’t learned this one simple lesson –
People ain’t shit.
Who is that person to talk down to you? If they aren’t in a position where you want to be in life – they’re a nobody.
They ain’t shit.
So don’t disqualify yourself from something you haven’t even tried. And don’t let someone else disqualify you because they don’t know.
Instead, give it a shot. If you can, you can. And if you can’t, then fuck it.
Not everyone can do everything. But don’t let their whispers get in the way of you doing what you want to do.
So there you have it. The reason you don’t make big changes is because you have a bad opinion of yourself and hang onto the bad opinions that come from others.
But what if I still won’t change?
Then you’re lazy.
But who isn’t lazy about doing shit they don’t want to do? If you really wanted to do it, you’d find a way to do it.
In extreme cases, you’d put yourself at a death ground. Plunge into the unknown where you have no choice but to make change.
When you have no choice but to change, you don’t give a damn about what people think of you.
Because you’re too busy trying to make shit happen.
Sometimes you can’t be bothered to live in the moment, and experience enjoyment or embarrassment.
Because you’re too busy guaranteeing a future you want to live in.
(You wouldn’t want to taste the shit you might be eating anyway.)
If you hate where you’ve ended up, then keep your eyes on the prize – the future.
And if it’s that bad then remind yourself that in two years this won’t matter.
Because as long as you keep working to get out of your hole – you will get out.
But for now you’re building patience. Which is a virtue for a reason.
Do what you gotta do, keep doing what you gotta do. Then over time you’ll get what you wanna get.
Why should you make a big move?
To make things clear, a big move doesn’t have to be a dramatic change.
But a big move can be:
- dropping from 230lbs to 160lbs
- traveling to a new country
- setting out on your own
- getting a girlfriend
- working at a better job
- etc.
Whatever changes your lifestyle intentionally is evidence that you’re living life and taking charge.
You live a life full of achievement and experience. Rather than an empty existence where you sit around and wait to die.
Think back to all of your past years. Did you make at least one move every year? Shit, I hope so.
Because at the very least it means you made your time count. And that matters.
So if you’re reading this and you haven’t done anything this past year, then I’ve got news for you –
It’s time to make your move.
See you next time,
- Rich
